Woke up to a coughing fit so shredding and rough that I nearly had a severe bout of incontinence. It hurts so bad, my chest I mean, is screaming at me. Full of shards of phlegm. Sharp and rough and hurting from front and back.

It's pretty frightening to wake up like that and it's hard to go back to sleep after such a wakeup. All the pain and frightening feelings makes it too difficult.

Nobody wants to pee in bed, no matter whether it's incontinence that's from painful choking waking up caused by an unknown or just a general problem. It's humiliating, for one thing. But more than the humiliation there's the underlying stress from the illness causing the choking and ripped up feeling.

I'm trying to chill now and get myself calm enough to sleep. Difficult as all get out. But necessary.